I used to not be a question asker. I thought it was rude and nosy to ask questions. I’d rather notice, be a detective and gather information, said and unsaid. But in the last few years, communities and relationships have become so fragmented that people have forgotten how to interact….and certainly, how to interact on a deeper level.
I’ve discovered a few well-placed questions move the conversation to depth. It doesn’t take much really. People are thirsty for it. They want to be known and asked after. And well, I am curious. I delight in hearing people’s stories. And nothing pleases me more than, listening to someone share their current struggle and then watch as they begin to see the bigger picture, become emboldened, encouraged and figure out the solution as I listen.
One question I’ve been asking often is: What theme keeps coming up for you?
I’ve discovered it is bit of a startling question for many. Artists love this question. We know that we tend to get obsessed on a few concepts for a while and all our work lends itself to this. When someone asks, we are happy to flush out the ideas that before only laid hidden in our inner life.
But I have watched too, as many are emotionally touched by the question. They haven’t had space to slow down and think about the thing that has been sitting or blooming upon their chest.
One friend tells me exhaustion is the theme that keeps returning. Upon further pressing, we realize this isn’t necessarily a negative theme. It is that life has been overflowing with goodness and opportunity. My friend has a difficult time saying no to every opportunity. His body is telling him it is time to be choosy. He gets to be choosy.
Another friend tells me hope is the theme that keeps returning. Does she have hope? Where does it lay? Is she living her life as if there is hope? I’m uncertain of the answer for her but to carry a bit of it with her I think was helpful. Until we meet again, we share memes and articles touching on this theme to guide and encourage each other. It also creates a touchstone for deeper conversations between us during our next encounter.
Still another friend says simplicity has been her theme. She noticed she had too much clutter, too much noise. She has too many apps, pays attention to too many news feeds. She desires silence and peace, focus and stability. And she thinks pairing down her life and focusing on what is truly important will guide her to that place.
And yes, I ask myself that question….often. Even now, when I ask myself, a bit of me answers defiantly, nothing really, I don’t have any themes that are reoccurring. And then it is as if I tell on myself: Surrender. This is the theme that keeps coming into my life.
When I decided to mediate on joy, I discovered fairly quickly that surrender has a lot to do with joy. I can’t make things happen. I can’t control everything. When I surrender to God’s plans and desires for me, joy opened up. His imagination is so much greater than my own. He had better plans that I could have imagined.
I am in that place again. Quit trying to control and micromanage. Surrender. Surrender to His will.
Good thing Lent is just around the corner.
Lent isn’t about giving up something. It is about giving more of my life, myself to Him.
What theme keeps trying to gain your attention?
*
Will the release of my book Undaunted Joy: The Revolutionary Act of Cultivating Delight just around the corner, (April 22) I’ve been booking podcasts and speaking engagements. Let me know if you’d like to schedule me for your church, school, book club or group.
*
I wanted to let you know I will be offering a two-hour generative workshop on Joy March 29th 10am-noon PST. $60. Information on my new Generative Joy Workshop here
Oh, to surrender! It is very hard for me to surrender (to trust) because I'm always afraid the bottom is going to fall out. This goes back a long, long way. But I have found myself growing so tired of that old fear. My theme is "brave." Learning to trust God and surrender takes a whole lotta courage for me. I'm trying new things this year! Taking little chances (they don't look like much to others, but are big for me.) But mostly praying for His will and not mine and the courage it takes to pray that and really mean it! ❤️ Blessed Lent to you. I'm so glad you wrote about Lent not being about lack, but about gain. So often that is missed and it's an excellent reminder. ❤️ Good strength to you!
Once again, such wonderful insight you offer us, Shemaiah. Thank you.
Surrender is one of those things that I don't think any of us ever outgrows or becomes an expert at no matter how much we actually surrender throughout life. Every day we're faced with so many opportunities to surrender or embrace our own way and, while it may become progressively more familiar and maybe even comfortable or "easy," I don't think the saying "practice makes perfect" applies here. But what an opportunity for us all to actively respond to the Holy Spirit's work to sanctify us until the moment when we finally are released from this world and life into our longed for eternal state. Every surrender is a step closer and an opportunity to experience the promise our transformation and renewal in Christ.
I'm not sure what theme keeps coming up for me but what a great question. I'm going to ponder it for a bit. My answer might be perspective/vision but I'm not sure. Ask me in a week or two. 😉